Part Two: Why Wait?

*WARNING* Uncomfortable territory ahead.

James 1:14 "But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed.

Sex. Yup...there it is. With the influence of friends (see previous post) and technology, sexual culture is an overwhelming issue swirling around young Christians like a seemingly unavoidable vortex. I'm not holding back. This issue resides in many churches and within many homes, often going unnoticed and ignored.

Young Christians get involved in relationships but are not ready to take on the responsibility of abstaining until marriage. One can clearly guess what this leads to.

Why should one refrain from sex anyway? Is it really that important? What does God say about it? Are my technicalities valid? Let's answer these questions and cover all the bases.

1. Why should I abstain?

• Simply because God says so in Hebrews 13:4. "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge."
• He also states that we should do away with our sexual immorality in Colossians 3:5. "Therefore put to death your members which are on earth; fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry."
• When reading 1 Corinthians 6:15-20, we can conclude that having sex with someone is intended for marriage because "the two shall become one flesh". This passage states that if one is joined with a harlot, then they are one body with the harlot. 
• If sex makes two people one, then having sex with multiple people means you have become one with multiple people.
• Sex is intended for marriage because the two should become one only in marriage, as seen in Genesis 2:24. 

2. Is it really that important/What does God say about it? *Get your Bible out*

• 1 Corinthians 6:18
• 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5
• 1 Corinthians 7:2
• Ephesians 5:5
• 1 Corinthians 6:9-10
• 1 Peter 2:11
• 1 Corinthians 10:8
• 1 Corinthians 6:13
• Revelation 21:8
• Jude 1:7
• Mark 7:20-23
• Galatians 5:19-21
• Matthew 15:19
• I believe the above scriptures should answer that question.

3. Are my technicalities valid?

• The excuse "we aren't technically having sex" is used often. Just because you aren't having "sex" doesn't mean it is not sin. Sexual immorality is engaging in anything sexual.
• People constrict the boundaries of sex to a very specific act in order to excuse their actions, when it actually encompasses much more.
• In the book "Checklist for Life-For Teens" page 54 starts the chapter on sex and intimacy. On page 55, we find a profound statement to answer this question (listed below).
• "Some couples try to redefine the word sex. As long as they don't go all the way, they figure they haven't had sex. They think they can nail their conscience on a technicality. Other couples draw an imaginary line, little by little, until eventually it disappears."
• Anything that tempts you to move forward with your lustful feelings and emotions (which must also be controlled) in a physical way is something that must be controlled.
• To put it bluntly...no. Your technicalities are not valid. Sex is sex, in whatever form it takes on.

The Solution:

• Surround yourself with people that will encourage you and help you maintain a sense of purity in your relationship. Read my previous post to get an idea of who those people should be.
• Building your relationship with God will help you set your mind on things above instead of things that are earthly. Colossians 3:2
• Eliminate things that tempt you. Whether that be found in technology or in a current relationship, we are told to do away with our old selves. Ephesians 4:22-24 & Colossians 3:5-17
• To expand on the previous point...if a current relationship is causing you to fall into sin, the right thing to do is to take away that temptation. Repentance is to turn away. If your partner will not choose to remain abstinent with you or encourage you to do the same, one must turn away from what will separate you from God.
• Technology is the largest cause of sexual immorality in today's society. Pornography is a disease that infects young and old minds alike. If pictures, videos, or social media outlets encourage you to participate or continually think upon sinful things...eliminate it. 
• Be honest and accountable. To your parents, your friends, or to your preacher. Whoever will uplift and guide you to remain abstinent, be accountable and open to them.

If you have already fallen into sexual sin and are thinking that it's too late or you're too far gone...you're not. You still have God's grace and forgiveness. By asking Him for forgiveness, you will receive it. BUT you must turn away from the sin. Repent (Acts 3:19). That is key. By turning away, you choose to remain abstinent in future relationships until marriage. 

I pray that you will find answers and hope in this post. If you have any questions, comment or contact me at karoberts98@gmail.com. 

                                                                                                                      God Bless, Kendall Roberts